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I Pity the Fools – David Thomas-Jensen – Medium

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I am really digging deep for sympathy for the kids who passively let their parents scam them into the college of their dreams.

I have a wife that listens to a local gossip radio station, to my chagrin. And grudgingly I find their conversations interesting and fascinating. It has grown on me. Gossip has never been my thing, I can note when something bad happens to a person, or when someone has a fall from grace. I am aware of the name, who it fell and I have my opinion like everybody else, but if you read my pantheon, there are few dramas about others that I am willing to discuss, but I for one am personally offended for anyone feeling any sympathy for any child of any overprivileged rich bastard who cannot figure out how to buy their way into a college like they used to, through endowments.

This requires two layers of stupid the first, not going directly to the school with checkbook in hand and asking straight up how many ( x )tuitions to make room for my single extra idiot kid. No scandal, schools do it all the time.

The second level of stupid is caring whether or not this will damage the reputation of the idiot’s kids when they catch you. The answer is, of course, and who cares.

It’s not like without that reputation this kid will ever want for a thing. No they will be an overprivileged rich kid for the rest of their lives, and buying them into a school was never going to change that, as will their parents going to jail for a couple of years change it. This might seem like a penalty, but trust me, to these people it may feel like the worst possible outcome, but to the rest of us, it a fucking scratch.

I mean a cat we rescued 6 years ago, had a seizure and was run to the emergency room, my wife a Master of Social Work and her stay a home gig, consultant, idiot husband, live paycheck to paycheck, the cost of emergency care and putting out cat down with dignity this morning was 700 dollars, money we borrowed on a credit card because we don’t have it, money that will take months to replace.

These kids, spend that on Saturday, with their friends, before lunchtime, without a thought.

Yeah, I heard all about it, some girl 19 a child of one of the guilty, Mossimo, (I have bought his shirts at Target) and his wife, what’s her name famous for being on “Full House” guilty of spending 500k to get a kid into USC. I guess the kid is getting bullied, doesn’t plan on going back, only 19. Has 1.5 million Instagram followers as an influencer in makeup. lost a contract with some makeup company, the gossipers claim this is a big deal she probably made 50k per Instagram post. Let’s say she made four in a month. 1 a week at that income.

Yeah, this poor 19-year old I am supposed to feel bad for, made 200k for posting about the makeup she put on 4 fucking times! That is 3.5 times I and my wife’s professional combined annual income!


Her feet have never touched dirt. She knows nothing of want, or challenge or anything other than a world kissing her ass. This terrible fate that has befallen her is the best, last hope that this kid has of becoming a human being.

Let’s talk about the tale of two priveledges, I feel privileged to have a home and a family and two healthy children, some do not. I am quite privileged to have enough to eat, some do not. I am privileged to be able to send my oldest age 3.7 to a Chinese immersion preschool, giving her an advantage, she has to earn, by learning two languages, one I do not know. An advantage I do not have.

These fucking people live in a privilege that should not exist. They live in a world of perfection, were dirt, dust, and worry about anything real never falls in the floor of their oversized massive insulting house. When they go on vacation it’s MONTHS LONG. And the 1st class Airline tickets alone cost more than my wife makes in a year.

If invited along would I go? I couldn’t live with myself if I did. If they offered me a cash out I would take it, and build an orphanage in a place where Privilege does not exist.

Let me tell you a third story about privilege. My friend and child refugee name Libam Muhammed, he is privileged to be in America, working two jobs, raising a family away from Somalia, where when he was 11 when Aidid came in and split the city of Mogadishu in half, (ref. Blackhawk Down) He fled with his 9-year-old brother from school barefoot through a jungle to reach Kenya and a refugee camp. (Ref. House member MN 5th district Ilhan Omar’s child experience) From there he entered the US. He is and feels privileged to be here raising his three children Here.

None of these people deserve pity, sympathy or even empathy. They know nothing of a life of challenge and struggle they know nothing of tragedy, they do not live on earth with you and me. I don’t know where they live. I know for damn sure if the best they can offer the world is a few makeup tips for a few million dollars, they definitely deserve this.

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